Lord of the Rings: Two Towers & Return of the King

After literally 12 hours of watching three Lord of the Rings movie straight, everything became a blur. Not to mention the heavy amount of junk food and soft drinks. So dot points it is, covering my jumbled and overwhelmed thoughts of the three films of The Lord of the Rings:

• I really didn't like Frodo. I don't know why. I admit that's harsh considering he didn't exactly ask for all this to happen and has to carry this massive burden. But I just didn't find him likable.
• Sam was an alright character. Applauding him for actually calling Golem out on his bullshit and saving and putting up with Frodo's crap. I mean, after Frodo pretty much banished him as a friend, he saved his ass from a giant spider and orcs and CARRIED HIM OF THE MOUNTAIN OF FIRE. Most loyal friend ever.
• I believe that Legolas is really a butterfly whose only purpose in the film is serve as a plot device that would spell out, state and explain the obvious things that are happening. Everything he said was hilariously unnecessary. I also think that if the group was in the modern world, he'd be a hipster indie. He's got braids, fish plait and a love for the environment going. He's also the prettiest
• Every female in this whole franchise is useless. Liz Tyler's character was the 'woe is me'/hopeless romantic; Cate Blanchett was just weird and no likey; Eowyn, well everytime she came on screen or said something my whole group of friends would boo her off because she was coming onto Aragon and that shit ain't allowed. 
• Aragon is cool. 
• Fight scenes were amazing but arduous
• Cinematography was breathtaking
• Can we just give Martin Scorese ALL THE AWARDS FOR HIS IMPECCABLE PERFORMANCE? Smeagol and Gollum were so unsettling and disturbing and horrifying yet hilarious and pitiful. Every moment was brilliant. Especially in the beginning of Return of King where we see his descent into darkness and madness. Just amazing
• Smeagol, in my eyes, was a schizophrenic, bi-polar, psychotic 5 year old. 
• Sadness and empathy for Faramir. Sibling rivalry and parental approval/acceptance/conflict seems to transcend every dimension/realm.
• DENETHOR YOU ARE JUST THE WORST.
• Boromir...Sean Bean....You lasted longer than I thought you would but for only one movie. 
• Whyyyyyyyyyy does there have to be a giant spider? This one moved really realistically too. Ughh that thing is unnerving.
• Woah and LOL at Saruman's death. 
• PIP AND MERRY = BRO'S4LYF
• Although I do admit Legolas and Gimli come pretty close with their competition to see who could kill the most in the war. Adorbz guyzzzz.

Ok right now I'm dead tired. Overall, it was great. I think I'm a bit brain dead and overwhelmed by the amount of drama I just sat through so I can't really process properly. I'm not a big, die-hard fan but I enjoyed it. I probably would have enjoyed it more if I watched them with proper breaks in between and if I didn't see ALL the extended footage. But I saw it with a huge bunch of my friends and it was a good day. Lord of the Rings....I give it 3 out of 5 overall.

My favourite out of the three was Fellowship of the Ring. My favourite character would either be Gandalf or Aragon. Prediction count:

• People die. BOROMIRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR 1/1
• The ring gets destroyed at the very end. It has to be right? That's the whole point of the whole franchise? Duh. 2/2
• There's an evil force that want's the ring for evil purposes? Because they're evil? Lol. 3/3

These don't deserve points because they're bullshit predictions. But I'll give myself some anyways =)

Special Announcement!

Hey non existent readers! I have some awesome and potentially dangerous news.

Next Thursday (Australia/future time), I am holding a Lord of the Rings marathon at my place with a bunch of friends in honour of The Hobbit coming out!

I've calculated and see that it is 9 hours and 18 minutes....not including extended scenes and footage that my friends have and we are going to watch. So this will be taxing day, whether it be on my health or emotional state or my mental state.

I'll try to figure out how to record my reactions in one form or another in order to do a full out review afterwards.

So here is my knowledge of Lord of the Rings (which is mainly made up of singular words and pronouns):

• Elijah Wood = Frodo
• His friend's name is Sam? Which is a weirdly normal name for this universe. I mean...his best friend's name is Frodo...
• There are two other guys and one of them plays Charlie from Lost
• They're hobbits which are different from dwarfs
• Middle Earth
• New Zealand
• Gandalf
• Sauron?
• Ring that has weird writing inside and does stuff and is significant
• Evil Dobby named Golem
• "My precious....."
• Orlando Bloom
• There's a lot of walking and journeying through New Zealand  Middle Earth
• Btw is Middle Earth the name of the whole universe or just the name of one specific section in the universe? See, I have the same problem with Game of Thrones. Is Winterfell the whole universe or just one region? DON'T ANSWER THAT

This looks like I know a lot (to me it does) but I'm just saying words that I've heard around everywhere. Because...you know...I live under a well informed rock. So here are predictions:

• People die
• The ring gets destroyed at the very end. It has to be right? That's the whole point of the whole franchise?
• There's an evil force that want's the ring for evil purposes? Because they're evil?

Yeah that's all. I don't know. 

Predictions for Sons of Anarchy, Supernatural and Game of Thrones (novel)

Ok. So this is going to be me making a complete fool out of myself. I can see myself in the future laughing incredulously at past me already. 

Sons of Anarchy.
Let me just start off by saying: I have no idea what this is or could be about. I've heard that it was amazing. And that's about all. I don't know any plot points, I don't know any characters or names. Someone had to accidentally mention it was about bikies for me to know that. I haven't even seen any tumblr gifs or graphics about it. So here are my blindly made predictions about Season 1, or the series in general:

• There are at least some attempts of anarchy
• I’m guessing that they’re not literal sons/brothers, but like, brothers in spirit? JC....
• Bikies is the only clue I got from a friend. I actually didn’t even know that. 
• Guns
• Men
• Shit man, I don’t know. I KNOW NOTHING!
• Tig. 
• Apparently tears shall be shed. Or endlessly flow. Forgot which one
  

Yeah talk about unprepared.....

Supernatural

To be fair, I've seen this season and remember half the episodes. So it isn't really fair for me to try and predict anything about this. 

Game of Thrones

Everything I know about this is from tumblr and friends. So these are predictions based solely on the television show which will probably sound ridiculous and weird when applying it to the novel. Here I go:

• People wanting to be THE king and/or queen? Of everything? 
• So apparently favourite/loved characters will be ripped away from you
• The hated ones somehow survive
• There's a dragon lady who can talk to them??
• There's a kid that everyone hates and wants to bitchslap
• Nudity and incest
• There's a throne....
• I feel like an idiot writing this. I’m pretty much all done
• There’s going to be a lot of snow
• Apparently Winter is coming. I don’t know if it actually arrives any time soon. Is it a metaphorical winter? Does time pass differently in this realm which means it takes 10 years for a literal winter to arrive? I DON’T KNOW. I’M GOING OFF TUMBLR GIFS AND I’M RUNNING OUT. I STARTED PANICKING BECAUSE I STARTED RUNNING OUT AFTER INCEST.
• Swords. I’m desperate at this point.
• Brief moments of happiness is followed immediately by tedious extended periods of grief and death

Yeah....so lets get to it!